Absolutely. Un. Fucking. Believable.

The Man is waiting to use our sole computer to watch some track meet. It's a thing. I don't know why. There's even some sort of fantasy element involved. (A fantasy track team, that is; if there's any sort of role-playing or masturbation while sprinting involved, I don't really want to know.)

But, I could not sleep, I tell you, until I posted a link to the best video game of ALL TIME.

It is called Left Behind: Eternal Forces. It's based on the hugely successful "Left Behind" series, all of which I'm sure you have read. (What? You haven't? BURN IN HELL, HEATHEN BITCHES!!)

Anyway, the premise of the books, from what I can gather, is that the rapture comes and carries away the pious, and the rest are left to fend off minions of Satan, or something along those lines. So, of course, some enterprising and righteous soul came up with this fabulous idea - a videogame, wherein you, the Christian hero, pump Jesus into these liberal gay demon bastards using a submachine gun.

But wait...it gets better! Once you tire of being the Christian hero (and who doesn't, quite frankly,) you can change sides! Yes, you can become Satan, and lead the demons into war on the Christians!

I shit you not, people. I'm so flabbergasted by this, and could write for literally hours on a) the hypocrisy of the whole gunning while Christian thing, b) the hysterical notion of little Billy idly discovering the dark side one day while playing with the Options button on his Playstation, or c) how Matt Groenig needs to sue them so badly. He's the one that came up with Rod Flanders' Billy Graham's Bible Bashers game. (You can even play it! Find Rod under the F-H file cabinet. I tried, but only converted one heathen.)

Actually, come to think of it, that mirrors my life pretty well. I'd better let him on the computer.