Monday, March 26, 2007


So, today was the day I was going to march into Site X and find out what their effing deal is with me.

I got there early in the morning - nice and on-timey, natch - to find the boss at Site X. I show her the appraisal from my co-worker - she is the head of a sub-department, and we'll name her "Florence," on account of the time of the month. The site boss says that she's cool with me, and didn't know about any problems. She and I decide I'll go talk to Florence at the end of the day, but generally there is no crisis, and this appears to be the end of it. Cool. One worry down.

The work day proceeds without incident, though I'm a little worried about talking to her all day. I go to meetings, do some writing, have a nice conference with another co-worker ("Carol," who has said how much she values my opinion) race very quickly home for lunch to let out the idiot puppy, go to some more meetings, and it was the end of the day. Bracing myself, I go down to Florence's office to find out what is her damage.

I walked in, settled down, and began with my carefully rehearsed speech.

Me: "Hi, Florence. Listen, I've been meaning to talk to you about some things you wrote on my performance apparaisal that got sent to my boss."

Florence: "Oh, yeah...that wasn't me. That was Carol. We filled it out together. I think you're awesome."

Me: "Ummmm...what?"

Florence: "Yeah, she was mad at you, maybe for forgetting that meeting? I mean, I'm the head of the subdepartment, so it has my name on it, but she wrote all the comments. Really, you're fine. I have no problems with you, and I don't think you're argumentative."

Me: "Erm...really? I guess...OK; well, uh, never mind, then. So...anything else I can do for you? No? Well...have a great afternoon, thanks!"

So, I spent all damn day worrying and stressing over this conversation, and I didn't even have the right person. (And no, I don't know why she'd put her name on it if she didn't write it.)

The damn thing gets more comical the longer I worry about it. In fact, I hereby deem this little incident funny, and no longer a problem.
As my hair muse, Sienna Miller, is going with mid-length hair this season, I went with longish. (I'm totally KIDDING about Sienna being my muse. She's not. Well, truthfully, she would be if I was a 105-pound millionaire.) It doesn't look much different, but it's shorter in back.

And there it is. It's a cute cut, though it needs a dye job something fierce.

(Jeez. Where did I get forehead wrinkles? At what point did I begin worrying about every damn thing, and thus furrowing my brow ALL THE TIME? I have always mocked the notion of injecting botulism into MY FACE, but perhaps there's something to all this. Note to self: Investigate multiple cosmetic surgeries.)
The new puppy and kitten are learning to like each other (NOTE: For the following pictures, please disregard Ugly Couch! It's not mine! Really! I'd never have a piece of crap like that in my house! My house is all hip and modern, and my furniture is all expensive and from Copenhagen!)

This is the biting and wrestling. It is very cute. It is generally followed shortly thereafter by the puppy yelps. (But she totally eggs it on.)

Are all puppies stupid, by the way, or just Shi Tzus? To say this dog is not the sharpest tack in the box is a violent understatement. Seriously, I can take her to the potty, and she will poop on the floor like three minutes later, staring at me with that sweet but vacuous little expression. "Do you love me? Am I pretty? What's your name? What's my name? What's "potty?" I don't know! I just want to wiggle and lick you!"

However, I am glad that I have Curbie to whip her ass, since I feel guilty doing it.
George W. Bush has 666 days left in office!


(Which, come to think of it, I've been shouting at the TV since November of 2000 anyway.)


Karla said...

1. I think you need to say something to "carol" who is obviously a passive aggressive two faced bitch.

2)that puppy is the cutest thing ever.

3) At the pet store (where I am sure lots of your money goes) there are these puppy training pads that are scented "interestingly" and encourage the little monsters to go on them. They totally work. That's how i trained Beaufort. You must also give great encouragement every time they go where you want them too and if they start to wee/poo somewhere you don't, you RUSH them over to the pad/grass/ugly sofa to reinforce. (A sharp NO when they poop somewhere wrong sometimes work, I swear once Beaufort actually peed backwards and sucked it back into herself when i caught her surreptitiously pissing in a corner.)
Dogs, like cats, don't WANT to mess up their homes, they just need encouragement as to where to let it go.
4. Love the hair. But liek I always say, when DON'T I love the hair?

Badger said...

So we should have CAROL killed now? Or what?

The hair is bitchin'.